These first two weeks have been good. While there are challenging moments that make me sigh & some that make me want to scream, we've been blessed with an abundance of awesome moments that have made it all soooooooo worth while.
On the night that A & K arrived, I was totally blown away. The exhaustion I felt that first night knocked me off my feet at 10pm & I slept like a log. The emotional rollercoaster that I felt like we'd spent the prior week riding had finally slowed down long enough for me to put on my seatbelt & get a firm grip.... and boy what a ride it's been ever since.
These days, I find that things are no more complicated or crazy than they were with 3 kids. I mean, the same struggles exist---getting rooms cleaned, sibling rivalry, sharing toys, the usual stuff. I feel like the kids have already molded themselves into our little family & are a part of us so completely. These sweet little ones are so flexible & willing to go with us, do with us...whatever we need to do, they're right there with us, anxious to fit right into the family. It's almost like they are made of clay---fitting the form & molding right into the group so smoothly. :)
The oldest of my brood, Savannah, is doing well. She's had several breakdowns since A&K arrived, but is doing well overall. She's learning compassion & understanding and is having fun with another brother. She & Andrew are best buddies most of the time. On Friday night, she spent the night with a friend. The rest of the crew spent the night in one room (our usual Friday night "party" over here!). When Andrew realized that Savannah was not going to be there w/ him, he said "It's just not as much fun without Savannah." She is well-loved and honored as the oldest "smartest" one. Everyone loves for Savannah to read them stories and play with them.
The second oldest of our crew, Andrew, is doing really well. The longer he's here, the more the walls fall down. I'm seeing a child emerge from behind the big tough guy walls. Last night I saw him cry for the first time. He was playing with one of my little hand-held weights that I use to work out & dropped it on his finger. OUCH! Two weeks ago, I suspect he would've sucked up the tears & acted like a soldier...but last night, he was a little boy! He came & snuggled in my lap, let me kiss his booboo & was able to be a little kid. What a blessing! I pray that those walls continue to fall. He's doing well in school, making friends and generally enjoying himself. I asked him tonight if he liked living here--and made sure to tell him that he could be honest if he didn't like it. He grinned from ear to ear, yanked me down beside him with a big hug & said "Yes! Yes! I love it here!". I'm so glad.....I love having him here, too!
Next in line is Mr. Samuel. Sambo has been so easy-going about all of this. Having a brother to make those nice armpit-farting noises with is his idea of paradise. (I'm so proud.....Savannah can do it, too.) Samuel has loved sharing a room with Andrew, but thinks that Kourtney is a bratty girl. Of course, he thinks that about Savannah & Sarah too. Only in the past week have I seen Samuel start to fuss about "having" to share his room. He doesn't so much mind Andrew being there...but he wants his bed! ha!
Miss Kourtney continues to do very well, too. She still says that she doesn't like school & wants to stay at home, though. When she moved in we felt like it was best for her to continue in Pre-K since that's what she was already doing....but I hate making her go now that she's saying she wants to stay home with Sarah & I. Considering that they only have 2 months to go and Sarah is needing some private mommy time, I guess I'll let her finish out the year, but I suspect I will continue to hear complaints. :( Her teacher says she is very pleasant & has many friends and she's doing great in school....so maybe she's fine once she gets there. Last week she made up a story to tell her class about what happened to her mom. Of course, what she made up with a million times worse than the truth. I didn't know what was going on in her little mind until the teacher told me what she'd said. Yikes! We talked about it & as it turns out, she doesn't want to discuss the true story at school, so she made up something that, to her, was better than the truth. We made sure to help her understand that if she doesn't want to talk about it, she can just say so....but making up stories isn't ok. She seems to get that now. I've noticed that Kourtney has a vivid imagination & makes up a lot of stories--- someone hit her (but they weren't in the room at the time!)...someone took her toy (but she's still holding it)....things like that. I think that she's dealing with things slowly & part of her adjusting to a new home/siblings/family is trying to figure out where her "place" is in this group. Poor kiddo has a lot of "new" to adjust to!
And last is Miss Sarah. Sarah has probably had the hardest time (of my bio 3) adjusting to all of this. Before A&K arrived, she was already feeling a shift of my attention & started regressing into whining & crying (loudly!) over things. She wants to make sure that I don't forget her, so she's throwing huge fits over the smallest thing. If she can't find her shoes, oh the waterworks.......... if she can't get a shirt off, oh my gosh, warn the ambulance crews.......you get the idea. You'd think, by the size of her tears, that she's been abused & forgotten about. I've made it my goal to spend as much of my Mon/Wed/Fri days off with her as possible. Of course, I still have dishes & laundry & vacuuming & errands & such to do........but I'm trying to take her to a special lunch every Friday and spend lots of time playing games with her and coloring pictures together, etc. With the increased focused attention, she's starting to move back in the direction of my "old Sarah". She is such a precious sweetie....I hate to see her feeling like we've forgotten her.
As for Larry & I, we're doing ok. Larry has really stepped up & begun helping me out more at home. It's not uncommon to see him working on a load of laundry before he leaves for work in the morning or emptying the dishwasher when he comes home or overseeing a shower in the bathroom at night. Good daddy! I'm doing alright, too. The initial adjustment phase seems to have passed & things are getting back to normal now. That's not to say that we were ever really normal anyway (ha ha!), but things are moving in the right direction....and that is good.
Galatians 6:9 "Do not grow weary in doing what is right, for at the proper time, you will reap the harvest if you don't give up."
Matthew 11:28 & 30 "Come to me all who labor and are heavily burdened & I will give you rest......for my yoke is easy & my burden is light."
Luke 18:17 "Suffer not the little children....let them come unto me."
Hebrews 10:25 "Don't forsake the gathering together with believers."
Having a great family of believers surrounding us on all sides is such a blessing. Thank you for your continued prayers and all the encouragement you offer us each time we're with you. It is not going unnoticed!
For those of you who've asked for specific prayer requests, here ya go.
For Savannah--continued understanding of the task we've taken on as a family and the compassion to help us in this journey.
For Andrew--he appears to be very close to a deeper understanding of God's love for him. Please pray that he will go beyond that simple understanding to a full relationship with Christ. Pray for him to reach a place where he can really mourn his mom's death and the "loss" of his dad. He will answer questions about it now if he's asked but doesn't volunteer the conversation.
For Samuel--to continue being flexible & loving with his new siblings.
For Kourtney--to grow to enjoy school.
For Sarah--greater understanding of the circumstances and to "grow" back to the place she was before.
For Larry & I-- to be able to continue ministering at Rose Heights as effectively as we did prior to our new family changes and to assimilate the kids into that lifestyle easily. For continued strength & boldness every day.
