interesting...

This afternoon when we got home from church, Savannah got all upset about something.  She was having a hard time calming down.  She had tears dripping off her cheeks onto her shirt & was having a hard time breathing (almost like hyperventilating).  Toward the end of her crying jag, she said "are you going to make me go back to a whole pill?".  Odd that she'd even think of that in the middle of being upset.  I hadn't mentioned it to her at all!

We talked for a while about anxiety & how it doesn't mean she's weird or strange or stupid or bad....it's just something she has to deal with.  Just like a diabetic would take insulin or a person with a headache would take Tylenol, people who have anxiety & depression struggles take medicine to help with that.  She talked about how her friends don't even know she has anxiety because they've never seen her like this....but then she went onto say they wouldn't understand it.  She finally calmed down & sighed....and said, "I guess I need my medicine."  She wants to try a few more days at the smaller dose, but she's understanding that things are getting more difficult in the afternoons & if SHE can see it & sees a need for the medicine, then I think we may just plan on going back to the full dose in a few days.

I just found it interesting that she's old enough to really "get" all this & see the need HERSELF, which is quite different from me pointing it out to her.  Very mature of her, don't ya think?

Update on Savannah

Several of you have asked about what kind of medicine Savannah takes.  She is on Zoloft for Anxiety.  Sorry...I guess I assumed everyone could read my mind & already knew that.  I suppose some of you do, but I can't remember who knows what about us or where you came into our lives along the path, so feel free to ask questions.  Let me see if I can briefly catch you all up!

 

Savannah was a very difficult baby/toddler.  Even as an infant, I knew something was wrong.  I could never put my finger on it, though.  Call it Mother's Intuition or whatever, but I knew there was something going on with my baby girl.  She's always been extremely emotional, very high and very low dips.  I remember telling the doctor that she's either here (with my hand wayyyy up over my head) or here (with my hand down by my knees)...there's no in between.  At one point, I questioned whether she might be Bipolar because of the extremes in her moods.  Of course, when you know there is something "up" with your child, you read everything you can get your hands on & so we considered a lot of things in all the research we did during those early years--- Sensory Integration problems, Asperger's (high functioning autism), ADD, bipolar, Oppositional Defiance, OCD....lots of things.  We kept plugging forward trying to figure out what was up with our little lady, watching her develop along the way.  I remember being AMAZED when she finished her very first church Christmas program--she'd actually made it through the program without freaking out & breaking down to cry on the stage.  I sat there in the service with tears running down my cheeks, and then went to hide in the bathroom because I had to 'get it all out'.  People just didn't understand how HUGE of a thing it was for her to do that.  It was a major victory in my book.  When she was 7, things really hit the "we've GOT to find out what's going on" point.  She was in 2nd grade, having numerous daily panic attacks in school, completely melting down over the most minor issues, saying she wanted to die, crying at the drop of a hat.  She became painfully shy (especially in school) & very introverted.  It was so hard to watch her like that b/c she looked like she was dying inside every day.  When her glasses broke, she walked around with her hands over herface because she was fearful of what people would say about her face without her glasses.  She was really obsessed with it so we got the glasses fixed as quickly as possible, but that meant taking her to school a little late (after we got them fixed).  She was panicked that she'd fail the entire grade for going to school late that one day!  There were times when she'd curl into a ball on her bed & sob for 2 solid hours over accidentally tearing a piece of paper.  She was a SEVERE perfectionist, needing everything around her to be totally "in line" all the time.  (That's when we considered whether or not she might be OCD).  When it started effecting her ability to function normally, we knew it was time to figure out what was going on.  We found an psychiatrist who is awesome with her!  We sat & watched him interview her and it just about killed us.  She sat on his couch, pulling off the cushions to build a little "wall" around herself.  She sat inside the pillow cushions to answer questions & if a pillow fell, she would retrieve it & put it back in place before she could continue talking.  It was like she had to have that little protective barrier in place to feel comfortable talking.  When she finally came out of her couch cushion "fort", she came over & curled up in my lap and hid her face in my hair to finish talking to him.  It was as if she was scared of talking without some sort of 'security' there next to her.  It was so painful to see our child like that, but it was also very eye-opening.  She described fears of me dying, fears of tornadoes (we'd never had a tornado or even much of a strong storm, so that was a surprise), fears of all sorts of things that we were really suprised by.  Anyway, I could go on & on, but what it boils down to is that she was diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder.  She does have some OCD habits, but they're not severe & don't really effect her ability to function in normal situations.  This page describes her soooo well (how she is without meds), I'll just let ya read it:  Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD)

 

And so, since she was 7, she's taken Zoloft.  It's been such a sweet transformation to watch her respond to the meds.  What a HUGE difference Zoloft has made in her life!!  She's able to cope with things sooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much better & able to deal with day to day life normally.  Every now & then, however, we have to experiment a little & see how she does without the medicine (or at least with a smaller dose).  When A&K moved in, she was under a TON of pressure & stress, so we temporarily up'd her dose to help her get through that, but by about 6 months into it, we were able to lower it again.  The last time we tried to wean her off the medicine, it was a complete disaster.  That was 2 years ago, so we're trying again.  The trouble is, puberty will either make her anxiety tons better or tons worse.  The wild & crazy hormones will either trigger her brain to start producing enough seratonin ........ or they will mess with her brain chemisty even further & the anxiety could turn into full blown depression.  Unfortunately, all of this is hereditary.  Larry's side of the family all deal with anxiety and/or depression, so it's not going to just go away.  She won't ever entirely outgrow it & it's very likely that her children will deal with it, too.  We're praying that puberty will bring a great reduction in her anxiety symptoms!

 

We're now at the end of the 2nd week with her at a 1/2 dose.  The first week was questionable---she was very weepy & moody, but that seemed to 'level out' at the end of the week.  The 2nd week has mostly been good, but the last couple of days have left me wondering.  By the afternoon/early evening, it's like the 1/2 a pill dose has worn off & she spends the evenings crying over the littlest things.  Today she got upset about something & just couldn't calm down.  She wasn't throwing a fit/tantrum...she just couldn't relax after getting upset.  An hour later, she was still sniffling & sucking air (as we call it...you know that short, fast sucking-in sound kids make when they're crying).  Maybe her body had enough of the med built up in her system to get through that first week without too much trouble....and now it's down to just what she takes each day (which might not be enough?).  I don't know.  I'm not a doc, but it makes sense to me in my head!  I'm going to give her a few more days & if this pattern of losing it in the afternoons continues, I'm going to call the doc & get his opinion.  He said Icould call if I had a question/concern, so I think I just might.  I don't want to still be doing this (wondering whether it's working or not) when we leave for vacation.  I'd rather know what we're doing by then!

 

On an upside------we registered Savannah for dance today!  She's taking Jazz (only).  She's very excited to get started again!  We're hoping that Sarah will watch Savannah's dance class & decide she wants to take dance again, too.  She did SUCH a good job last year (especially twirling) so I hate to see her give it up entirely, but she's determined (for now anyway) that she doesn't want to do it this year.  She can still jump in later if she changes her mind....so we'll see.

 

Whew....I guess this is enough of a novel for now, so I'll hush.  Sleep well!  It's bedtime!

Samuel's funny comment today

I had a little giggle today & thought I'd share with ya.  As usual, my funny story is from something Samuel said.  :)

On Monday afternoon when we picked up Sarah from her first day at day camp, we were waiting in the car line when a lady wearing a tiny little halter top walked down the sidewalk beside us to pick up her child.  Larry commented on how the lady's shirt didn't look much bigger than a napkin.  We all talked about modesty and how important it is.  The funny thing is, we really don't have to address it much with our kids because they've never really been around immodest people, so it just seems "weird" to them to dress that way (hallelujah).

So the week has gone on, each day at 1:00 dropping off Sarah & every afternoon at 4:00, going to pick her up at the same location.  Every day Samuel & Savannah have been in the car with me.  Today however was different.  When we pulled up to pick up Sarah, Samuel was eyeballing the sidewalk up & down the street.  He said "Mama, where is she?"  Thinking that he was talking about his sister, I said "She's still inside, honey.  They don't bring her out until we pull up to the door."  He acted like he was confused, but took me at my word.  When we pulled up to the door, I put the nametag sign in the window for the teachers & they walked Sarah out.  About the time I shut the door (thank goodness the door was closed!), Samuel asked me again "Where is she???".  When I asked him WHO, he said "Napkin Lady!"

It took me a minute to realize who he was talking about before I cracked up!  The little knucklehead!  I guess it just goes to show....he's a BOY!

and now for a funny entry

 Jeff Foxworthy's Take on Teachers

HOW DO YOU KNOW YOU ARE A TEACHER?  Well, you might be a teacher if....... 

1. You can hear 25 voices behind you and know exactly which one belongs to the child out of line.

2. You get a secret thrill out of laminating something.

3. You walk into a store and hear the words "It's Ms/Mr. _________" and know you have been spotted.

4. You have 25 people that accidentally call you Mom/Dad at one time or another.

5. You can eat a multi-course meal in under twenty-five minutes.

6. You've trained yourself to go to the bathroom at two distinct times of the day: lunch and prep period.

7. You start saving other people's trash, because most likely, you can use that toilet paper tube or plastic butter tub for something in the classroom.

8. You believe the teachers' lounge should be equipped with a margarita machine.

9. You want to slap the next person who says "Must be nice to work 7 to 3 and have summers off."

10. You believe chocolate is a food group.

11. You can tell if it's a full moon without ever looking outside.

12. You believe that unspeakable evils will befall you if anyone says "Boy, the kids sure are mellow today."

13. You feel the urge to talk to strange children and correct their behavior when you are out in public.

14. You believe in aerial spraying of Ritalin.

15. You think caffeine should be available in intravenous form.

16. You spend more money on school stuff than you do on your own children.

17. You can't pass the school supply aisle without getting at least five items!

18. You ask your friends if the left hand turn he just made was a "good choice or a bad choice."

19. You find true beauty in a can full of perfectly sharpened pencils.

20. You are secretly addicted to hand sanitizer.

 

and finally...
21. You understand instantaneously why a child behaves a certain way after meeting his or her parents.

 

News on Andrew & Kourtney

Yesterday we received a big brown envelope full of paperwork in the mail from Jerry & Betty's attorney.  We knew they'd located one & were getting things started for the custody transfer, but weren't sure how long it would take before we'd hear from the attorney.  I had anticipated this being a really hard thing emotionally...but I'm okay.  Really, I am.  I will always have a HUGE soft spot in my heart for the kids & will forever wish things had turned out differently.  Mother's Day will always be hard, as will other milestone dates that relate to the kids, but I am at peace with how things are.  I know God is running the show & things are as they are supposed to be.

The more than time passes, the more God has given me a greater understanding of things.  I guess I knew these things all along, but I'm understanding now what God had in store for us the whole time.  He had a plan & a purpose for mine & Larry's involvement with Andrew & Kourtney.  You see... the kids needed a place of security & stability immediately after their mom's death & their dad's imprisonment.  They needed a home, they needed boundaries & rules & lots of love & nurturing.  They needed "parents" who could fill a gap during a time of need.  There were a lot of needs there.  While I never planned on their stay being temporary, God had it all figured out from day 1 & knew that, when the time was right, He would have them move on.  But before doing that, He  needed us to show them HIM.  They were filled with Scripture, prayed over, annointed & blessed.  They were taught about God & church & praise/worship.  They were given a very clear path to Christ in our home.  They were given opportunities & were able to see what a 'normal' family operates like.  Now, please understand I am NOT tooting my horn.  I'm sure we fouled up plenty along the way, but we were able to serve the purpose God had in store for us by providing A&K a place of security during a very scary time in their lives.  Had they moved immediately to Jerry & Betty's house, their lives would be different today.  We may not know until eternity what difference we made in their lives, but I know that we were obediant to God & that He is pleased with what we did.  And really, that's all the reward I need---knowingthat He is pleased with me for obediance.

So anyway, we got the custody paperwork.  Larry will took it to the office today & ran copies of it all before signing it & putting it back into the mail to the lawyer.  Of course, it's not finalized yet, but it will be in a few more months.  At that time, I'm sure that Larry & I will make a quick trip to Victoria to go to court & make it all 'official', but for now, we can rest in knowing that the process has been started.

I wrote this letter to the kids a couple weeks ago.  It really does express how I'm feeling now.  (Since I've recently been asked that very question, I hope this answers it for those of you who've wondered.)

July 6, 2007

Andrew & Kourtney,

In February 2006, my family grew by 2 kids. (YOU TWO!) Right away, I wanted you to feel at home, to feel like you'd become a part of our family & our lives. I think we did an OK job of making sure you felt comfortable with us. But in the time it took to make you feel comfortable here, something else happened. I grew to love you guys like my own kids.

I dremt of Kourtney's dance recitals & her wedding day and the day that Andrew becomes an engineer or a bull rider (ha ha). Andrew, remember all the nights we spent snuggling in your bed, talking & reading books, acting silly & laughing? Of course I'm sure we'll both never forget "It's HOT in Topeka!" Kourtney, remember all the silly stories we made up together & all the nights you woke up & came to cuddle with me after a bad dream? Remember drawing pictures for your mom & tying them to balloons to float up to Heaven? Remember the cross we put up in Elkhart for your mom? Remember our neighbors--(i'm not including those kids' names here, but they were in the letter)? We have lots of good memories, don't we?

The truth is, I still love you both very much! My heart still hurts a little every time I think of all our happy memories together, but I know that God has a different plan for your lives & He's moved you to where He needs you to be. From what I hear, things are going great in Victoria & you have all sorts of fun things to do! (To tell ya the truth, I'm a little jealous about the trampoline!) Sure, I'm sad that you can't be here with us, but I am happy you are with your Uncle Jerry & Aunt Betty because that's a better place for you. Your mom would be so happy to know that you are living with her brother! Just like when you lived here, I'm sure there will be times when you wish you could go somewhere else, and that's ok, because deep down inside you know that Jerry & Betty love you with all their hearts and want what is best for you. And so do Larry & I and Pappaw Jim and Mammy and Mammaw and your dad and Aunt Debbie.

I loved the time that I got to share my home & my heart with you. Thank you for being my "kids" for the 13 months you were here. I will always be here for you, so feel free to call or write or email anytime. Jerry & Betty have our phone numbers & address, so just tell them when you want to get in touch and they'll help you find us one way or the other.

Now it's time for me to go, so give each other a great big hug for me & be sweet to Jerry and Betty and B (their son--I'm also not including his name here for privacy reasons). Tell your mom's parents HELLO for me the next time you see them and give them a big hug, too!

I'll write more later & tell you about what's going on here, but for now I just wanted to make sure you know that I love you and always will.

Enjoy the rest of your summer and make sure to write us at the end of the summer & tell us about what all you did!

LOVE YOU BUNCHES,

Aunt Liz

P.S. I have your boxes of stuff packed up & will ship them next week. (baby books, pictures & stuff from the drawers in my closet)

med taper

Today is day 6 of Savannah being on 1/2 a pill.  (12.5 mg/day)  She has been more weepy/moody this week, but maybe another week at 1/2 a pill per day will help her even out. 

We want her to get by on the lowest effective dose, but when this is working, I hate to mess with it further.  I know I should, though.  I just don't want to see her 'crash' & hit the depressed/wanting to die/constant panic attack thing that she had prior to meds.  I think I'm going to give her another week of this lower dose & if she continues to have no struggles, we might go to 1/2 a pill ever other day.

Boy...this is tough stuff.

Savannah's medicine taper

hmm....today has made me wonder.....  She's been real weepy & very moody all day.  I am going to leave her at 1/2 a pill per day for now, but I am questioning if this will work.  Pray for my sweetie, ok?

Sun 7/15 through Tues 7/17

We've had a good beginning to the week.  Sunday night, Samuel went to a friend's house to spend the night.  He had a ball.  The little boy he spent the night with has a strange custody situation.  His grandmother has had custody of him most of his life, with his dad (her son) very involved all along.  The boy's mom is remarried to someone else & until recently only had occasional visits with him, but has become more involved lately.  So when Samuel spent the night, he spent the night @ the grandmother's house with the boy & his dad and then the next day, grandma went to work while dad hung out all day.  He had as much fun as the boys did, I think--taking them swimming & to the park, etc.  Samuel feels like he really lives it up when he goes to their house!

Monday night we took the kids to see Evan Almighty.  It was a really CUTE movie!  We really enjoyed it.  It is a VERY loose interpretation of the Biblical Noah's Ark story, but it has a lot of good moral value to it.  Other than one part that was maybe a little 'much' for some kids (although mine thought it was hysterical!), we really liked it.

Savannah started her science day camp this week.  She's having fun in "Paper Sculpture" camp.  They're making all sorts of cool origami-like things all week, but in between projects they're working on a paper chain contest.  You know the little paper chains we make for our kids to countdown to Christmas, etc?  Well, they're doing that....only they're having a contest to see whose can be longest.  So far, Savannah said she's winning because it's almost as long as the room!  LOL!  Don't challenge my baby...she'll do everything she can to WIN!

We've also begun a medicine taper for Miss Savannah.  The doc wanted us to give it a try between camp & our trip to California, so here we are.  On Sunday, I dropped her down to 1/2 a pill per day & so far, we're doing ok.  She does seem to have a quick temper the last couple days, but then again, she's had a quick temper for a long time....not sure that has anything to do w/ the meds.  It's just funny that she's lost her temper even MORE quickly these past couple days....maybe it does have something to do w/ the medicine....hmm....

My kids are so funny...ya know?  Yesterday, while driving to pick up Savannah @ day camp, Samuel & Sarah actually got into an argument over the color gray.  Yes, you read that right...the color gray caused an argument, and a heated one, too.  Oy!

This morning has been pretty interesting.  Sarah's pushing a rolling cart around with rolled up papers (with a rubber band around the middle) saying she's selling newspapers.  She's got on one of Samuel's ball caps with her hair hanging in her face saying "get your newspapers here....only $1.....get your newspapers".

Ahhhh.....selling newspapers & arguments over gray....day camps & slumber parties.....that's what summer is all about, isn't it?

Friday & Saturday

Savannah got home from camp yesterday afternoon.  She is hoarse (from screaming & singing all week at camp) and very tired, but otherwise, she's just excited to be home.  She lovedddddddddd going to camp, but when she stepped off the bus, she made a B-line for me & hugged me for a long time.  :)  My baby is still very much a hugger!  She got to pick out where we went for supper (Applebee's) and then we came home & all watched the camp DVD.  They put all the week's pictures on a DVD with music each year, so we made sure to buy one.  It's a really neat keepsake of her week at camp.  Once that was over, she crashed for the night.

Today was a good day.  Larry had to go to Dallas for a DivorceCare4Kids training seminar, so he was gone ALLL day (he left at 4:30am & it's nearly 9pm....he JUST got home).  So while we missed daddy, it was made good by a visit from a friend!  My friend Lisa & her husband and kids have been in Japan for the past 2 years.  They were here for Savannah's 9th birthday party, but then left soon after.  Lisa's husband is being stationed in Nebraska & they have to report there next week, so they came through Texas to visit her family on the way.  I got to have lunch with them today.  I wish she could stay here.  Our kids played together soooo well.  It was so sweet to see them so naturally bond especially since they all barely remember each other (if at all).  Lisa and I went to high school together and worked together at Mazzio's (my first "real" job--and the place where I met Larry), so we go way back!  :)

ahhhh.....a good Saturday.

Thurs July 12

Another good day!

This morning, I started cleaning & organizing my bathroom.  I'm embarassed to say how long it's been since I last did that.  And hey...you can see the countertop now!  After all that time spent organizing all the "stuff" in the cabinets & culling out products I never use or won't use again, it didn't hit me til late tonight....I forgot to clean the shower/tub.  Duh!  That's kind of a big part of the bathroom.  Hmm....looks like I know what I'm doing tomorrow morning!

I stopped cleaning the bathroom mid-morning to go eat lunch w/ my mom & the kiddos at CiCi's.  Yum!  I love their spinach pizza!  I think I'm going to go buy a whole pizza from them sometime b/c I never want to stop eating that stuff!  Hmm...now that I think about it, maybe it's best that I DON'T buy a whole spinach pizza from them.  ha ha!

We came home & rested for a while.  Sarah's Wed. night Daisies teacher called to invite her to Jumpin' Jacks Party Shack this afternoon.  (www.jumpinjackspartyshack.com)  It's a neat place the kids have been to a couple of times....just one big open warehouse sort of place w/ giant inflatable bouncy things for the kids to climb on & have fun getting all sweaty.  :)  She had fun!

When we dropped her off, Samuel was pouty because (as he put it) "the girls get to have all the fun today".  Since he was getting left out of "all the fun", I took him for a little date.  We went to Braum's & had icecream.  We even sat inside & ate it slowly.  I think THAT was the biggest "treat" to him.  We never go into a restaurant & sit down to eat anything these days.  Having me all to himself for a little while was a big surprise to him, I think.  We got several grins from older folks who were there (at 3:30) eating their dinner.  Remind me not to drink a milkshake again, though.  Over the years I've developed a bit of lactose intolerance & that much sugared down milk product gives me such a tummy ache!  It was 7:00 before I fixed a baked potato for supper & even that was hard to stomach.  I can handle a little icecream (like one scoop) but eating a whole bunch isn't real smart for me anymore!  Oh well, my baby boy had fun & enjoyed his chocolate icecream w/ chocolate syrup!  (yes, he's indeed my son with his chocolate fixation)

I spent much of the day working on cleaning & organizing the bathroom after we got back from lunch w/ mom.  Unfortunately, in all that cleaning & organizing I found what appears to be itty-bitty mouse poopies under my bathroom counter!  Eeeek!  If you don't know me well, then you don't know that I have a severe mouse/rodent aversion!!!!!  I set a trap & put it under there & as of yet I haven't caught anything, but trust me.....when I do, I will NOT be the one removing the nasty creature from my bathroom cabinet!  That is Larry's job!!!!!!!  Hopefully this is the evidence of some long-since-gone creature........but if it's still hanging around somewhere, hopefully we'll get him/her soon!  YUCK YUCK YUCK!!!!!!!

Tomorrow my biggest baby girl comes home from camp!!!  Now that the week is coming to a close, I feel safe in posting the camp website.  I didn't want to do that early in the week in case some psycho happened to be reading & went to hunt down my baby!  But by the time anyone could drive there tomorrow, she'll be headed home!  So anyway, she's at Camp His Way again this year.  The website is www.camphisway.com.  If you click on "group pictures" on the left side of the screen, you can see our group.  They're at the very bottom of the page (July 9-13 group).  There are 2 pics.  One is the "serious" picture & one is a "silly" shot.  Savannah's on the far right side of the pic, standing beside a little blonde haired girl w/ glasses.  She has a bandana in her hair.  Can ya find her in the pic?  (It's sort of like Where's Waldo isn't it?)  Anyway, peek around the camp website.  It's an awesome camp!!  This is Savannah's last year to go (due to age), but next year Samuel will be old enough to go & Savannah will be in the Youth group, so she'll have some other cool place to go!

I guess I'm going to close this out now & head to bed soon.  It's 11:00 now....time to start yawning! 

Wed July 11

What a great day we had!

This morning, the kids & I went to the library for the summer reading program club meeting.  The theme this morning was "sail off into space".  The kids ate some "astronaut food" (Tang) and listened to space stories and then made a little rocket that we took outside & blasted off!  (Put 1/2 of an Alka-Seltzer tablet into a tiny bit of water inside a film canister---which is stuck inside a paper tube---it 'blasts' off quite well!)

We came home to eat a quick lunch &  have a speedy quiet time before it was time to 'blast off' again---this time to my friend's house to swim!  Of course neither Samuel or Sarah can really swim, but luckily her pool is only 3' deep, so no one drowned.  (though Sarah thought she was going to at one point!)

By the time we got home from swimming, it was time to take a bath, clean up, eat supper & head to church.

It was a full day...and a fun one!

Tomorrow, we were supposed to go eat lunch w/ Larry @ the church, but he had to cancel due to a special lunch meeting he must attend tomorrow.  Anyway, since he can't eat w/ us & the kids were already excited about doing that, I told them we could eat with someone else!  Grandma is coming to our house in the morning & will ride with us to a little pizza buffet in town.  It'll be a sweet treat for all of us!

Sunday 7/8/07

Yesterday morning, Sarah wanted to call Kourtney.  (She's usually the one to initiate those calls lately.)  We got to all pass the phone around & talk to both Andrew and Kourtney.  You'll be proud of me.  This was the first time that we've talked to the kids that I didn't hang up & cry afterward.  It's also the first time that Kourtney hasn't asked me when she can come back "home".  It was also the first time that Andrew hasn't had a "one up" attitude about everything he says.  Up until now, all the conversations with him have been like this:  "We got a rocket toy."........" Yeah, well I invented that rocket".  Ok, so maybe not that exactly, but you get the idea.  Very monumental phone call!  Before we hung up, I talked to Betty & she said they've found an attorney to get the custody arrangements taken care of.  In a few more months, they will "officially" be Jerry & Betty's kids.  I'm sure that time will be difficult for me emotionally, so if you think of it, go ahead & start praying for me on that.  I mean...my BRAIN knows that this is best, but it's still very hard emotionally at times.  The waves of emotion aren't nearly as giant & rocky as they were at the beginning of this rollercoaster ride, but when I slide down the valleys, I still hit bottom pretty hard.  (At this point....many of those valleys hit at about the same time each month, if ya know what I mean, so at least I can see them coming & recognize it for what it is & it doesn't take me by surprise so much.)

I've started working on my lesson plans for the Fall.  I know....I've got 2 months before the first day of school still and I could put it off, but I really LOVE doing lesson plans.  It's hard work & takes a lot of creative juice to get it done, but I really do enjoy it!  I'm anxious for school to get started now!  I'm going to have a ball with a new group of kids and I can't wait!

While Savannah's gone to camp this week, I think we are going to unbunk the girls' beds & re-do the way their furniture is layed out.  They've been saying that they don't want bunkbeds anymore, and now that we're not trying to cram 3 little girls into one room, we really don't HAVE TO have bunkbeds, so I think we're going to take them apart.  She'll be in for quite a surprise when she gets home.  It'll take some sweat & elbow grease,but we can get it done.

I am getting giddy.........a month from today we will be in California.  In fact, a month from right now we'll be putting anxious kids to bed---anxious because we plan to spend the following day at Disneyland!!  WooHoo!  Vacation, here we come!!!!!  We are actually going for my friend's son's Bar Mitzvah, but we'll spend several extra days in town to enjoy lots of neat things we'll never get to do again---Disneyland being one of those big things!  The kids have a Disney vacation planning DVD I got free in January & they've watched it over & over.  Yahoo!

I better get done reading my emails & hit the sack.  Time for bed!

Our week

It's late Friday night as I type this.  Well, technically it's Saturday morning.  I'm going to type this & then hit the sack.

This week has been great, so I thought I'd share.

On Monday, we didn't do much of anything that I can remember.

On Tuesday morning, Larry & Samuel went to a Cub Scout thing at the local fishery center (didn't even know we had a fishery center!).  They had fun while the girls & I hung around at the house.  Then we all spent the afternoon running errands.  We went to the Green Acres library (a local large church that houses a fabulous Christian books/videos/music library).  I checked out a Bananas comedy DVD that you ladies must see---it's Anita Renfroe (or Renfrow?).  She's a hoot!  You'll love her.

Wednesday was the 4th of July, but as we've had for the past 50000000 days (or it feels about like that many!), it was raining so pretty much everything got cancelled.  We spent the day hanging out at home, watching Star Wars & grilling in the rain.  It was fun....but it would've been more relaxing & fun if it weren't the thousandth straight day of rain that has kept us cooped up inside!  (Did I mention that we're tired of the rain?!)

Thursday morning Savannah had an orthodontic appointment & I went to pick up paperwork at the new place I'll be working this Fall.  That was cool b/c it made it all seem more "real" & "official"!  We went to my ex-job that afternoon & went ahead and cleaned out my filing cabinet.  They told me I could have all the curriculum that I'd used these past 2 years, so I jumped at the chance!!!

Today, Friday, was good--even if it started out to not look that way. 

I spent the entire day (seriously!) in my pajamas....not b/c I was lazy but because I was cleaning all day long & didn't want to get cleaned up to sweat some more.  You see, at 5:30 this morning, Larry's cell phone rang.  He's subscribed to a "Thunder Call" service that alerts you to bad weather.  (It's really annoying when it rings in the middle of the night or the wee hours of the morning like this!!!)  Anyway, the phone rang.  After answering it, he went to the bathroom & loudly said "Hey, get up & come here.  The bathroom's flooded again."  :::sigh:::  Yes, this is the 2nd time in the past 3 months that it's happened.  The firsttime, we caught it as it first started coming in under the walls.  We got it all sopped up & put fans on it & all was well.  No damage to the floors or walls or anything!  This morning, everything was standing in 1/4 to 1/2" water by the time we woke up.  Not just around the perimeter of the room, but the entire floor.  Ugh....since it was so early & we were half awake as it was, we put towels down to soak it all up, wrung them out & then put down more & went back to bed.  By the time we woke up a few hours later, the water was pretty well all soaked up so we started washing all the wet towels & put the fans back on the floor.  Again, it looks like God was gracious & nothing is ruined....but man, I'm tellin' ya.....I'm sick of all this rain!!!!!!  Since the first time that the bathroom/laundry room flooded, it's NEVER been dry enough for Larry to go out & seal up the underside of those walls.  If it would ever quit raining for about 48 hours, he could fix the problem--where the water is getting in.  I can't tell ya how happy I was to see SUNSHINE this afternoon!  Now if that will just hold for about 2 days!!

Tonight was great.  The ladies from our old church invite me to all their girls' night outs & I never have gotten the chance to go!  Tonight I finally did!  We went to Piddlin' Pottery & painted our own pottery pieces and just hung out & talked.  It was great to reconnect with faces I haven't seen in nearly 3 years!  There were new faces, but for the most part, I felt right at home & it was almost like we never left Bethel.  I love you girls!!!  Thanks for inviting me!  Let's do it again!  I made a yellow mug with little purple flowers with blue dot centers.  I plan to use it as a pencil/pen holder on my desk this Fall!

Tomorrow I'm going to help Savannah get packed for camp.  This coming week she'll go to Camp His Way like she did last year.  She is soooooooo excited!!  If you'd like to take a peek at the camp website (it's such a cool place!) or if you'd like to send her a message while she's gone (by email), let me know & I'll send ya the link to the site!  She would LOVE to hear from people while she's there.

Ahhh...it's been a good week.

 

Let Freedom Ring!

It's now officially a couple minutes past midnight, so it's July 4th, Independance Day!  Let freedom ring!

Freedom...what does that mean to you?  My first thoughts are the usual patriotic type---freedoms we have as Americans, freedoms that we so often take for granted, freedoms that so many people don't have.  Freedom to speak however we choose, freedom to do just about anything we want to.  Freedom to even write this blog!  Indeed, freedom is all of that, and this year I can thank my good friend Ann's husband for helping our great nation to have FREEDOM!!!!!!  Thank you Dave!

But freedom is so much more than that!

Do you know the greatest freedom there is?  Freedom from rules & regulations that bind us.  Freedom from a life imprisoned & bound & tied & chained to sin.  Freedom in the most intimate sense only comes from a relationship with God!!  If you don't have that freedom, please email me, call me, send me a message on myspace.  Whatever you have to do, get in touch.  I'd love to explain this to you personally!

Independance Day indeed!  LET FREEDOM RING in your life!