Sunday June 18

Because Larry is on vacation this week, we went to our old church this morning.  It's really weird to see how different it feels after just 20 months.  The majority of our SS class was out of town, so we didn't really see most of them & the senior pastor we loved so much has left the church & moved away, so that was different, too.  Even the seating was different---chairs turned in a different direction.  The halls were painted a new color (it looked nice!), and there was a little "sitting area" in the foyer that wasn't there before.  Funny how small differences make such a HUGE impact on someone when you've been gone a short period of time.  We saw lots of familiar faces & hugged old friends, but overall, it just didn't feel like "home" anymore.  I guess that's good.  When we left, it was really difficult to think of the new church as "home" & now the tables are totally turned.  Thank you, God, for taking us to right where we needed to be!
This weekend we got the pictures back from our Six Flags trip with Sarah.  On our way home, before we picked up A&K, we went to the wrecker yard to see the van that G & Kelly had the wreck in.  I wanted to take some pictures of it before they haul it off & sell it for scrap.  I was just blown away by the condition of it.  Shocking how much damage can be done to a vehicle.  Anyway, I was looking at the pictures yesterday & all of the kids wanted to see.  I wondered if it might be too much for A&K, but decided that, in the long run, it was one more piece of the puzzle to them.  They wanted to see the scene of the wreck before & wanted to see the pics of their mom's funeral over & over, so leaving out this one piece of the big puzzle that is their life seemed wrong.  I went ahead & let them take a peek at the pictures.  They seemed to both be affected by what they saw, but are remarkably resilient.  I guess they have been through so much that seeing the pics of the van were "nothing" in comparison to all the changes & new things in their lives.  Andrew told me last night (at bedtime) that seeing the pics made him miss him mom a little more than before......but then he held me tight & snuggled a little longer than usual.  I pray that he can see me as a new "mommy" figure in his life & hope that will bring healing to him....having someone to replace the mother he lost.  He wanted me to re-explain the wreck to him, where it happened, who was driving, what they hit, the whole thing.  I'm not sure if that is somehow therapeutic to him or if he just wanted to see how long I'd keeping laying there for snuggles.  :)  Kourtney calls me "mama" freely, but Andrew never has.  He definately sees me as a sort of mom, but he calls me Aunt Liz.  I don't know if he'll ever reach that point or not.  He has a lot more walls to break down before that happens, I think.  Then again, he may not ever call me "mom"....and if that's how it is, that's ok, too. 
If you would like to see those pictures, I'm ok with sharing with family & close friends.
A funny thing happened today.  We went out to eat lunch after church for Father's Day.  We barely got seated before I heard the couple at the table behind us saying something about "Cheaper by the Dozen".  It didn't dawn on me for a while that he was commenting on US!  I guess I never think of us as a huge family or anything.  I mean, I suppose a family of 10 or 12 kids would be pretty HUGE, but 5 doesn't seem all that enormous to me.  (Of course, don't ask me that on a day when I'm pulling my hair out & looking for sources of chocolate to keep me sane!)  I guess when I really think about it, 5 kids is a lot, but it just never really occurs to me to think of us as a carnival sideshow or anything!  I refuse to let the kids act like wild monkies in public, so there is not usually much of anything for people to SEE if they choose to stare.  Anyway, knowing that we were being "watched", I made sure to whisper to the kids how it was a special treat to go to a nice restaurant ("nice" as opposed to the drive thru at McDonald's!) and how we needed to use our best behavior so that all of those around us would know that we represent Jesus.  I was soooo pleased.  The kids all behaved sweetly.  No one ever fussed or whined or squealed or argued or anything!  When we left, there were lots of eyes looking at us---including one man who never seemed to stop staring the entire time we were there!  I guess we were quite a sight to see.  LOL!  Thankfully, they were all SMILING at us.
Of course, we weren't home long before war broke out....but hey, they were nice in the restaurant!  :)
I got this in an email today &thought I'd share.  It is sooo true.  And after you read it, don't get me started on all the things that I would like to claim as my "excuses"!  I could make a list a mile long, but the truth is, God doesn't call the equipped, He equips the called!

The next time you feel like GOD can't use you, just remember...
Noah was a drunk
Abraham was too old
Isaac was a daydreamer
Jacob was a liar
Leah was ugly
Joseph was abused
Moses had a stuttering problem
Gideon was afraid
Samson had long hair and was a womanizer
Rahab was a prostitute
Jeremiah and Timothy were too young
David had an affair and was a murderer
Elijah was suicidal
Isaiah preached naked
Jonah ran from God
Naomi was a widow
Job went bankrupt
Peter denied Christ
The Disciples fell asleep while praying
Martha worried about everything
Mary Magdalene was...
The Samaritan woman was divorced, more than once
Zaccheus was too small
Paul was too religious
Timothy had an ulcer..AND
Lazarus was dead!
Now! No more excuses!
God can use you to your full potential.
Besides you aren't the message, you are just the
messenger.