Mon PM--bummed yet hopeful

How's that for a weird title?

This morning before the interview...and last night....I was reading Scriptures looking for some hope/encouragement about all this job search stuff.  Everything I read was something along the lines of "not my will but yours Lord".....or "and lo they went into the valley and were crushed"...... not exactly the most hopeful things as far as what I was hoping to get from it!  But I kept thinking "that's either God trying to tell me that this isn't the right one.....or it's Satan trying to discourage me before I ever get started".  I guess I had it set in my mind that I was going to get this job, so I was just determined it was Satan trying to discourage me & I put it out of my mind.

So this morning I had the 2nd interview for the ISS job.  It was a very short interview & I left feeling like it had been one of those "formality" sort things (as in, it just seemed like a box to check off the paperwork...ya know?).  Half way through the day, my most recent boss (it feels weird to call her an ex-boss!) called me to tell me they'd just called her to check my reference.  That gave me even more confidence that I was bound to be hired!  During the interview, I told them that I had 2 more interviews in the next 2 days and that I'd like to be able to cancel those interviews (grin).  They seemed to understand that & assured me that they'd call me & let me know one way or the other "within the next day or two".  I left feeling really confident and so, I wouldn't let Savannah on the computer (nor did I get on it) all day because I "just knew" they'd be calling to tell me I got the job.

Late this afternoon I got an email telling me that they'd selected the other candidate for the job.

I guess it just goes to show that you can't get your hopes up or your heart set on something before it happens....and that you must listen to God when He speaks through Scripture!  While I've said all along that I want to be where God wants me (& I really do!!!), I'm still disappointed.

And so now I embark on 2 more interviews in the next couple of days.  I am grateful that God has given me these two opportunities.  I am anxious to see how these two go and will let you know after they're done what comes of them.  I have decided that I will NOT get excited about either position until I am handed paperwork to sign to start the job!  I can't afford to let myself get excited & then face another possible let down.  I realize it's "just an aide job", but we're talking about my future here & the uncertainty is just well.....yucky!  I know that when God shuts one door, He opens another one.  I know a better job is out there...the one where God wants me.  I know that....but I'm still a little bummed.

Anyway.......that's where I am now.....  disappointed, but hopeful that one of the other jobs will work out.  :::sigh:::